Functional Idiots Podcast
The Functional Idiots Podcast is hosted by Colton and Dillon, both of whom are idiots who somehow function in everyday life. Think of it as a functional drunk, except we could fail a sobriety field test sober. They discuss the offbeat news stories of the week, but also the hard hitting stuff like, “When someone has multiple children at once, twins, triplets, etc., who is the planned child, and who is the accident child?”. They also make fun of people who can’t seem to get out of their own way in life, and bust each other’s balls along the way. If you yourself feel like a functional idiot waltzing through life, then this is the perfect podcast for you! The Functional Idiots Podcast, the dumbest two hours in podcasting!
Listen on:
Episodes
Monday Dec 11, 2023
Monday Dec 11, 2023
Greetings fellow Stupid-holics! We are back after a week off due to prior plans, but we've returned back with a banger. In this episode, we give our opinions on religion, and some of the associated issues with it. We also touch on reasons to leave wild animals alone, along with some of the dumbest newspaper headlines imaginable. Of course, everyone's favorite segment, Pornstar Birthdays, is included, because why wouldn't it. Enjoy!
Music licensed by Epidemic Sound
Intro Music: We Got the Balls - Rockin’ For Decades
Trivia Music: 1. Scorpions - Bonnie Grace
Find My Boy and Bring Him Home - Bonnie Grace
So Mad Intro: Death and Destruction - Off Cuts
Pornstar Birthday Music: Last Move - White Bones
Outro Music: Put Me on Fire - Off Cuts
*All sound effects are used under free use copyright*
Email the Show: ifstupidhadaname@gmail.com
Podcast Website: https://ifstupidhadaname.podbean.com/
Twitter: Stupid Productions
Monday Nov 27, 2023
Monday Nov 27, 2023
Hello fellow Stupid-holics! We are back after taking a week off due to not being able to record, but we came back with a bang! You will hear Dillon on the hot-seat for trivia. Deion Sanders gives us a geography lesson. The cluster F that was the Nagasaki atomic bomb mission, and of course, the ever favorite, porn star birthdays. Enjoy! (Due note, next week there will NOT be another episode as more scheduling conflicts are going to happen, and we will not be able to record an episode)
Music licensed by Epidemic Sound
Intro Music: We Got the Balls - Rockin’ For Decades
Trivia Music: 1. Scorpions - Bonnie Grace
Find My Boy and Bring Him Home - Bonnie Grace
So Mad Intro: Death and Destruction - Off Cuts
Pornstar Birthday Music: Last Move - White Bones
Outro Music: Put Me on Fire - Off Cuts
*All sound effects are used under free use copyright*
Email the Show: ifstupidhadaname@gmail.com
Podcast Website: https://ifstupidhadaname.podbean.com/
Twitter: Stupid Productions
Monday Nov 13, 2023
Monday Nov 13, 2023
Welcome fellow Stupid-holics to Episode 10 of If Stupid Had a Name! In this episode, Dillon gives us an update on his janky car repairs. Trucker Thoughts makes a return, along with the new personal shows' favorite, Pornstar Birthdays. The Weekly Stupid Report has some bangers in it, and Facebook is being a literal pain in the butt. Enjoy!
Music licensed by Epidemic Sound
Intro Music: We Got the Balls - Rockin’ For Decades
Trivia Music: 1. Scorpions - Bonnie Grace
Find My Boy and Bring Him Home - Bonnie Grace
So Mad Intro: Death and Destruction - Off Cuts
Pornstar Birthday Music: Last Move - White Bones
Outro Music: Put Me on Fire - Off Cuts
*All sound effects are used under free use copyright*
Email the Show: ifstupidhadaname@gmail.com
Podcast Website: https://ifstupidhadaname.podbean.com/
Facebook: Stupid Productions
Twitter: Stupid Productions
Monday Nov 06, 2023
Monday Nov 06, 2023
Greetings nimrods! In this episode, What Are You So Mad About? makes a return about a certain genre of music. We have a new segment about certain celebrity birthdays. Master-Debaters is about paranormal activity, and 69 (nice) Seconds of Hell trivia returns to put Dillon on the hot seat, and much, much more in the episode. Enjoy!
Music licensed by Epidemic Sound
Intro Music: We Got the Balls - Rockin’ For Decades
Trivia Music: 1. Scorpions - Bonnie Grace
Find My Boy and Bring Him Home - Bonnie Grace
So Mad Intro: Death and Destruction - Off Cuts
Pornstar Birthday Music: Last Move - White Bones
Outro Music: Put Me on Fire - Off Cuts
*All sound effects are used under free use copyright*
Email the Show: ifstupidhadaname@gmail.com
Podcast Website: https://ifstupidhadaname.podbean.com/
Facebook: Stupid Productions
Twitter: Stupid Productions
Monday Oct 30, 2023
Monday Oct 30, 2023
Hello everybody! In this 8th installment of If Stupid Had a Name, we talk about bathroom stalls being too short, girl measuring, the World Series, and more. Dillon goes on the hot-seat in 69 Seconds of Hell for some Batman trivia. Dillon also talks about his shotty car repairs and a new segment called Trucker Thoughts. Enjoy!
Music licensed by Epidemic Sound
Intro Music: We Got the Balls - Rockin’ For Decades
Trivia Music: 1. Scorpions - Bonnie Grace
Find My Boy and Bring Him Home - Bonnie Grace
All sound effects are used under free use copyright
Email the Show: ifstupidhadaname@gmail.com
Podcast Website: https://ifstupidhadaname.podbean.com/
Sunday Oct 22, 2023
Sunday Oct 22, 2023
*Note: There were some recording issues in this episode where the audio doubled up and sounds like an echo. The problem has been rectified from this point forward, and we apologize for this.*
Welcome to Episode 7 of If Stupid Had a Name! In this episode, we fulfill our promise from last episode and talk about standardized testing. Also, songs that bring a tear to our eyes'. Of course, the Weekly Stupid Report comes up and has some stupidity in it. Dillon's facts of the week returns, along with a trivia segment about Marvel that Dillon tries. We finish up this episode with What Are You So Mad About?. Enjoy!
Music licensed by Epidemic Sound
Intro Music: We Got the Balls - Rockin’ For Decades
Trivia Music: 1. Scorpions - Bonnie Grace
Find My Boy and Bring Him Home - Bonnie Grace
All sound effects are used under free use copyright
Email the Show: ifstupidhadaname@gmail.com
Podcast Website: https://ifstupidhadaname.podbean.com/
Friday Oct 13, 2023
Friday Oct 13, 2023
Welcome Back! In this excessively long episode, we talk about our past week and the crazy, mostly stupid, stuff we did at work, or that co-workers did. We also discuss the dumbest things we've seen people do, along with ourselves. The Weekly Stupid Report has some bangers in it, and some much more in the absolutely packed episode. Enjoy!
Music licensed by Epidemic Sound
Intro Music: We Got the Balls - Rockin’ For Decades
Email the Show: ifstupidhadaname@gmail.com
Podcast Website: https://ifstupidhadaname.podbean.com/
Friday Oct 06, 2023
Friday Oct 06, 2023
Welcome back to If Stupid Had a Name Podcast! In this episode, me, and my co-host Dillon, talk about people whose name's fit their profession, along with someone whose name fits the crime they've committed. Also, we discuss our thoughts on the Great Pacific garbage patch, and recycling to boot. We feature another addition of Am I the Asshole? and also some NSFW would you rathers, and to finish off, we give our thoughts on foldable phones. Enjoy!
Music licensed by Epidemic Sound
Intro Music: We Got the Balls - Rockin’ For Decades
Email the Show: ifstupidhadaname@gmail.com
Podcast Website: https://ifstupidhadaname.podbean.com/
Monday Oct 02, 2023
Monday Oct 02, 2023
Welcome to Episode 4 of If Stupid Had a Name! In this episode, we talk about a major airline dropping that ball on a diverted flight. An interesting conversation about the problem with modern news organizations, along with the worst excuses of people being late, and the most disturbing thing you wish you didn't know. Enjoy!
Music licensed by Epidemic Sound
Intro Music: We Got the Balls - Rockin’ For Decades
Email the Show: ifstupidhadaname@gmail.com
Podcast Website: https://ifstupidhadaname.podbean.com/
Monday Sep 25, 2023
Monday Sep 25, 2023
Welcome back! In this third episode of "If Stupid Had a Name", we talk about ongoing possible fights at work, weird news that includes a questionably colored fish, and a crazy loon stealing a tank. We also hit on clothes that should have an age limit. Reddit makes a return again for a good laugh, and we finish off with a discussion on "What Are You So Mad About?". Enjoy!
Intro Music: We Got the Balls - Rockin’ For Decades
Email the Show: ifstupidhadaname@gmail.com
Podcast Website: https://ifstupidhadaname.podbean.com/